Mums in Tech ft. Alex Elderfield
As part of our ‘Mums in Tech’ series, we caught up with Alex Elderfield, Head of Platform Infrastructure at RM.
The purpose of our 'MotherBoard’ content series is to highlight incredible working mums within tech & data, as well as individuals and businesses that are supportive and progressive within their approach to creating more inclusive tech & data teams for women.
Firstly, can you please introduce yourself and tell us a bit about your current role?
I entered the IT industry 26 years ago as a surprise detour after my music degree and a brief foray into accountancy and accidentally ended up on this incredibly rewarding career path! I joined a small web agency with basic HTML skills and left almost ten years later as an experienced software engineer. In 2008 I joined RM Technology’s Software Operations team and spent the next 15 years supporting platforms critical to the education of school-aged learners across the UK and beyond.
In July 2023 an opportunity arose in RM’s Assessment division – a business that provides online assessment and marking services to awarding bodies around the world – where I remain as the Head of Platform Infrastructure. I am responsible for the design, delivery, optimisation and technical operations of the infrastructure underpinning our current and future products and services, achieved through my team of 100 engineers across the UK, India and Australia.
If you could sum up what it’s like being a working mum in tech in one sentence, what would it be?
Being a working mum in tech is challenging and rewarding – challenging because balancing the frequently unsociable hours with family life requires meticulous planning and contingency; rewarding because it allows me to set an important example to my children and their peers of how a woman with family commitments can excel in a traditionally male-oriented industry.
“So many of the barriers to success for working mothers revolve around the fact that we juggle work and family commitments.”
How do you find the balance between your career and motherhood?
The balance has shifted over the years. I took a full year of maternity leave with both children (now 12 and 14) and the early years were challenging at times with sleep issues, childcare coordination and later dealing with the expectation that mothers should be available to attend school events in the middle of the working day! Throughout their primary school years, I focussed on developing my technical expertise and enjoyed the satisfaction of excelling in my area, but did not pursue the more strategic roles and their accompanying accountability and pressures.
Now my children are older, their needs are different, and this has allowed me to secure my current senior role. There is more predictability to the times where I need to focus on parenting – transport to clubs for example – and I use the two-way flexibility in my calendar that comes from working for a global organisation. Planning is key to achieving the balance and it is essential to set clear expectations of boundaries at work on occasions when family plans are important.
What has been your greatest challenge as a working mother in tech?
The Covid lockdowns! When schools were shut in 2020 and we found ourselves trying to educate and entertain two young children, my team supported a platform that underpinned access to online learning for all state schools in Scotland and thousands more in England. As you can imagine, work became insanely busy and high pressure, and I lasted three weeks before politely telling our primary school that our children would read and get fresh air every day, but that was our limit, and we’d help them catch up later.
When the second schools closure came around in 2021, we were better prepared, and I blocked my work schedule with a dedicated hour each morning and afternoon to focus on parenting. This worked so much better – my children were happier with the predictability, and I was less stressed.
“The priority is for employers not just to provide the opportunity for men to take an equal share of the family commitments, but to model and normalise the behaviour.”
What skills have you developed as a mother that have helped your work life?
How to deal with impatient/grumpy people. (Really!) Dealing with tantrums, hormonal overreactions and squabbles in children – and especially teenagers – is proving an ideal training ground for dealing with difficult scenarios at work. The problems are usually bigger, but the same approach to active listening and measured response brings results.
When you were returning to work, what one thing helped you / would have helped you the most?
The practical accommodations were essential: flexibility when childcare didn’t go to plan, and a private space to express milk as I was still breastfeeding.
“You can’t be everything to everyone all the time.”
What do you feel should be the top priority for employers who want to support working mothers better?
So many of the barriers to success for working mothers revolve around the fact that we juggle work and family commitments. Society expects us to coordinate the family calendar and defaults to mothers being the primary contact for childcare and school, and employer support is usually focussed on ways to help us multitask across it all. This won’t change until working fathers have an equal expectation on them to coordinate family commitments with their work. The priority is for employers not just to provide the opportunity for men to take an equal share of the family commitments, but to model and normalise the behaviour.
Any final words of advice for other mothers in the Tech Industry?
You can’t be everything to everyone all the time.
Decide on your personal priorities and boundaries. For example, you might decide that dinner and bedtime with the children every night is non-negotiable, and therefore you do not work between 5 and 7 in the evening but commit to logging on at 7pm for half an hour to deal with urgent end-of-day emails. Find out what works for you through trial and error, then set clear expectations at work and at home, and live by those expectations.
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