Mums in Tech ft. Irina Predescu
As part of our ‘Mums in Tech’ series, we caught up with Irina Predescu, Product Designer at Irina Designs Ltd.
The purpose of our 'MotherBoard’ content series is to highlight incredible working mums within tech, as well as individuals and businesses that are supportive and progressive within their approach to creating more inclusive tech teams for women.
Firstly, can you please introduce yourself and tell us a bit about your current role?
I'm currently contracting with Speek (lets-speek.com) as their Head of Product Design and User Research, where I get to blend my passion for crafting thoughtful experiences with product strategy and business goals to launch an MVP for UK's first digital support app for parents of children who self-harm. In my previous roles, in the most recent years, I had been a Senior Product Designer for a social mobility/EdTech startup, and a large e-commerce UK brand.
If you could sum up what it’s like being a working mum in tech in one sentence, what would it be?
It feels like surviving, but not quite thriving, on either side.
How do you find the balance between your career and motherhood?
I think working in tech gives me the privilege of flexible working, which is much needed. Most employers I’ve worked with so far have offered some degree of understanding and flexibility around my personal circumstances, and understood that sometimes personal life also happens during the 9-5.
Career and motherhood can only go hand in hand, they are not mutually exclusive, and I could not be in a role or company which doesn’t get that. I’ve learned to accept that some days, my job may require a higher percentage of my energy, so I have less to give to my daughter in the evening. Other days can be easier at work, and I engage and interact with her perhaps differently.
As a single parent, I’ve learned to offer myself some compassion, and realise that whatever my day looks like, I do always try to give my best to both parts of my life – but sometimes my best can mean more or less on different days. And that’s ok. We’re not superhuman, we’re not here to burn out, we’re here to try to enjoy life as much as we can in all aspects. And if I put too much pressure on myself to always give 100% of myself to each aspect of my life, I could burn out quickly. I’ve accepted that some days at work I get through my tasklist quicker, or that sometimes in the evening, a 5-minute dinner prep is all I can do. At the end of the day, the business won’t fail due to a task left for the next day (or sorted out after bedtime), and my daughter will be fine with one occasional quick dinner, if she usually has very healthy and nutritious meals.
What has been your greatest challenge as a working mother in tech?
“In tech” can mean many things, and since having my daughter four years ago, I’ve worked in three start-ups and one mid-size business which had been established a long time ago. It was only when working in the start-ups where I felt more under pressure and sometimes had that affect my energy or mood at home (albeit fairly briefly, as I became aware of it, and tried my best to not let it happen for long, or ever again). The start-up environment is, of course, notorious for being fast-paced and with more pressure. So, naturally, being a part of that as a mother and single parent, has not been a walk in the park. I’d love to see if one day I can find the balance between finding a purpose-driven start-up and not feeling like I’m penalised on my time and energy at home because of where I work.
“The start-up environment is, of course, notorious for being fast-paced and with more pressure. So, naturally, being a part of that as a mother and single parent, has not been a walk in the park.”
What skills have you developed as a mother that have helped your work life?
Motherhood has definitely changed so many aspects of me, and has pushed me to learn many things from scratch, or given me a strong desire to take a deep look at myself – who I am, how I think, how I behave – and how I can improve myself to be a better mum, and a better role model for my daughter as she’s growing up. Perhaps one of the biggest learnings was being more aware that what people say and do can be heavily influenced by a need they have, which they aren’t always communicating with you. Learning to read between the lines sometimes to figure out what is causing a behaviour allows me to better support others in the way they need.
When you were returning to work, what one thing helped you / would have helped you the most?
I returned to work the day my daughter was four months old. I was in a remote role, and that helped tremendously. I think if I had been required to go to the office so early, I would feel even stronger a regret of not spending enough time with her, and not being able to see her more.
I was also breastfeeding, and being at home allowed me to do that at the same time as working, instead of pumping in an office room or toilet (which is what I ended up doing when she was around eight months old and I was going to the office twice a week).
And then there is the tiredness that comes from having such a young baby who still feeds at night, or needs changing, or isn’t sleeping well – that exhaustion would have been significantly increased if I had to wake up early, get ready for work, come back home late, and so on. So that flexibility in the first few months back at work was great. Another thing that I found difficult, was the ability to focus and work full-time (I didn’t start work again in a part-time role), to catch up with what had been done the 4-5 months prior, to pick up where others left off, and so on. I felt the need to ramp up quickly, and my brain was simply in a bit of a fog, and I felt like I was failing under that pressure in the first couple of months.
Perhaps if mothers returning to work can do so in a part-time role, that would help – maybe it would have helped me, but who can say for sure?
What do you feel should be the top priority for employers who want to support working mothers better?
Empathy. Wanting to truly understand the working mother’s situation, and her new lifestyle. Trying to understand what she might need – flexibility in working hours, reduced hours, a bit of extra help in the first few weeks back, no pressure to perform 100%, the need for (more) remote work, and so on. And to understand that, at the end of the day, it’s very likely that all of this is not due to the mother not wanting to do a good job. She’s likely trying as hard as she can, and she cares, and she wants to do a good job. But she’s just been through a massive change, she’s a different person now, and there are multiple things to deal with outside of work or sometimes even in parallel, at the same time.
Any final words of advice for other mothers in the Tech Industry?
I truly believe we’re all out there trying our best. At work, at home, and in every other aspect of life. If you are someone like myself, who puts a lot of pressure on herself most of the time, hopefully this one word is all you need: compassion. Have a bit of self-compassion. You’re doing a good job. You’re amazing. You’re trying, learning, failing sometimes, and trying again. And that’s just the best way to go about it.
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